Welcome to my first ever blog post.
Before I begin lets define an introvert.
Introvert Definition: The definition of an introvert is someone who prefers calm, minimally stimulating environments. Introverts tend to feel drained after socializing and regain their energy by spending time alone. … In other words, if you’re an introvert, you were likely born that way.
And again lets define a shy person:
1: easily frightened : TIMID 2: disposed to avoid a person or thing publicity shy 3: hesitant in committing oneself : CIRCUMSPECT 4: sensitively diffident or retiring : RESERVED also: expressive of such a state or nature a shy smile.
Sometimes introverted can be used as a synonym for being shy, but for me they mean two completely different things. If I’m shy, that means I don’t really know you as a person, my natural instinct is to take a step back, and observe from a distance to see if you’re the type of person that I could engage in conversation with.
Observation, to me is very important as well, just as speaking may be important to some, because observation allows me to see how the person reacts and behaves. Observation allows me to see some aspects in people, such as if the person is repetitive in speech, then again my natural instinct is to zone out and daydream, which to some can be seen as a bad trait.
I don’t have the energy to be competing with someone who is flamboyant, I feel in those circumstances it is better to listen, that to compete with someone that can come across as flamboyant, and dominant in certain conversations. What some fail to realise is that conversations are between A and B and some people just like being A and completely forget about B.
In most cases I am B and have developed great skills in listening, that I’m now an expert.
When someone tells me I’m shy they are very wrong, I’m shy in certain situations and I’m shy in certain conversations but that is not the word I would use to define myself.
I’m an introvert period.
Shopping, clubbing, parties, public transportation, anywhere where I’m surrounded by people for a long period of time, physically and mentally drains my whole being.
I’ve also been told that I am physically attractive, and men think that gives them permission to harass me on the street. (I can discuss mens behaviour in more detail on a later date).
On a day to day basis people stare at me. We are all human, some of us love to stare more than most.
For an introvert who can be shy sometimes, this can be distressing, having men try staring at you (staring competitions) and women looking at you up and down. It’s too much sometimes.
If I’m being stared down, I usually find that it makes me feel self conscious and I just want to walk as quickly out of the situation in a place where I can recharge.
When I’m surrounded by large groups of people and I’m forced to talk, this wears me down, and can become mentally draining.
My Room, cinemas, any chilled environments, I love, because these are the environments where I can recharge and fully engage and be myself.
There are times when spending too much alone time becomes a bit too much, and I need to go to busy environments to balance myself out.
I just want people to know that just because I like to spend most of my time on my own, does not mean that I don’t like you as a human being, this also does not mean that I’m anti social, this just means that I need to recharge my battery so that I don’t become mad.
In order for me to spend a long time with a person, I also need to spend a lot of time with me.
This is just who I am.